Fat Girl's Journey

Friday, October 2, 2009

It's been almost a year since I last posted. It would appear I'm as consistent with this blog as I am in going to the gym.... Actually, I'm more consistent about going to the gym than blogging. And that's a really sad statement given my gym habits.

Where I'm at right now -- same weight. This last year has been frustrating. Not much in the way of progress. That being said, losing weight and keeping it off is largely a mental game. It's easy to feel discouraged. I started in the spring of 2006. There's a negative voice in my head that beats me down saying I should be at goal NOW... that I should have actually reached it sometime in 2008. It's a loud voice. It's the same one that taunts me when I drive by Dunkin Donuts. It's the one that tells me, when I've made a bad choice at a meal, that I might as well blow the rest of the day. And after I've blown the day, it tells me I might as well just give up for the week. Sometimes I listen to the voice. I don't advise it. I've never been happy with the results. It also tries to tell me that I might as well just give up because I will never reach my goal.

But there is this other voice. That voice reminds me that I've lost 100 pounds. I may not be at goal. But it's been over 3 years since I started seriously losing weight. Although I have not made much in the way of progress this year, I have held my ground. That's something. I've read articles and seen some discouraging statistics about maintaining weight loss. I wanted to do more than maintain. I certainly thought I'd have more to show for the past year than simply maintaining. But maybe I should claim that and appreciate it.